Christmas with your partner's Mexican family

Free: get the starter kit with all 10 rescue phrases as a PDF and a checklist for your date.

Christmas with a Mexican family is warm, loud, delicious, and long. If you're spending it with your partner's family for the first time, here's what to expect, and exactly what to say.

What to expect

• Nochebuena (December 24) is the main event. Extended family gathers for a big dinner that often starts late and can run toward midnight. Some families go to Misa de Gallo, the midnight mass, first.
• At midnight, everyone hugs. Expect to hug every person in the room and say ¡Feliz Navidad!
• December 25 is often quieter, with the recalentado: reheated leftovers from the night before.
• Las Posadas (December 16–24) are nightly celebrations with songs, candles, a piñata, and hot ponche. If you're there early, you may be invited to one.
• Día de Reyes (January 6) brings the rosca de reyes, a ring-shaped sweet bread with tiny figurines inside. Tradition says whoever finds one hosts a tamale party on February 2, Día de la Candelaria.

The food you'll probably see

Every family has its own menu, but these are common at a Mexican Christmas:

• Tamales: often made together by the whole family days before.
• Pozole: a hominy soup, red, green, or white depending on the region.
• Bacalao a la vizcaína: salt cod stewed with tomatoes, olives, and peppers.
• Romeritos: greens in mole, often with shrimp patties.
• Pierna or lomo: roast pork leg or loin.
• Ponche navideño: a hot fruit punch with guava, cinnamon, and sugar cane.
• Buñuelos: crispy fried dough with syrup or sugar.

Etiquette that makes a great impression

• Bring something: a dessert, a bottle of wine, or flowers for the host.
• Greet everyone individually when you arrive and again when you leave.
• Accept the food, and try a bit of everything. Compliment it specifically.
• Offer to help in the kitchen or with clearing the table.
• Don't slip out early. If you need to leave, say goodbye to each person.

Phrases for the night

A short toast you can give

If there's a moment when glasses go up, this short toast will be remembered long after the tamales are gone:

If their family isn't Mexican

Colombian families often gather for the Novena de Aguinaldos, nine nights of prayers and carols from December 16 to 24, with natilla and buñuelos. December 7, Día de las Velitas, fills streets and homes with candles. Our full guide to a Colombian family Christmas.

Puerto Rican families celebrate one of the longest Christmas seasons anywhere, with parrandas (musical surprise visits to friends' homes), pasteles, pernil, arroz con gandules, and coquito, a coconut eggnog. The festivities run well into January. Our full guide to a Puerto Rican family Christmas.

Questions

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